All Alone (# 222)
Tom had been in business for 25 years and was finally sick of the stress. He quit his job and bought 50 acres of land in Alaska as far away from humanity as possible.
He saw the postman once a week and got
groceries once a month. Otherwise, it was total peace and quiet.
After 6 months or so of total isolation, someone
knocked on his door.
He opened it and there was a huge, bearded man
"Name's Lars, your neighbor from forty miles up the road. Having a Christmas party Friday night ...thought you might like to come...about
"Great," says Tom, "after 6 months out here, I'm ready to meet some local folks. Thank you!"
As Lars is leaving, he stops. "Gotta warn you
...There's gonna be some drinkin.'"
"Not a problem," says Tom. "After 25 years in
business, I can drink with the best of 'em."
Again, as he starts to leave, Lars stops. "More 'n
likely gonna be some fightin' too."
Tom says, "Well, I get along with people, I'll be all
right. I'll be there.
Once again, Lars turns from the door.
"More 'n likely be some wild sex, too."
"Now that's really not a problem," says Tom, warming to the idea.
"I've been all alone for 6 months! I'll definitely be
there. By the way, what should I wear?"
Lars stops in the door again and says,
"Whatever you want.. Just gonna be the two of us."
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